What’s Wrong with Me?
My heart is racing, and my breathing is quick and shallow. I feel like I need to run, run fast and not stop. Life seems to be spinning out of control. My body is clammy, and I see stars. I am overwhelmed with a panic unlike any I have ever known. What is wrong with me? Thoughts were swirling in my head like, “I’m going to die soon I know,” “Someone call an ambulance please,” “Someone help me please!”
However, an ambulance is not what was needed. What I did not know was that I was experiencing a full-blown panic attack. An ambulance was not required, but some help was much needed.
A God who Orchestrates
Somehow, someway, God stepped right into the middle of my panic attack. I don’t know how He orchestrated it, but He did! Isn’t that just like God? He’s always arranging events on our behalf, and we don’t even recognize it!
In the middle of what I didn’t know was a full-blown panic attack, somehow my pastor’s wife phones. We text each other often but rarely do we talk on the phone. It had to be a God-orchestrated event for her to call right in the middle of this event. The words are flying out of my mouth like crazy with gasps of breath in between, “There’s something wrong with me. I don’t know what it is.” I start quickly explaining my symptoms.
No Ambulance Needed
The response I received, I never would have expected. I needed my friend to call an ambulance. Instead, there was this firm but a quiet voice that said, “Karen, you are having a panic attack. I need you to say three things you are thankful for.” I graciously rebelled. There was no way in the middle of thinking I was dying was I going to stop and list three thankfuls. Again, a quiet but firm voice reminded me that I needed to speak power over the enemy and the way I would have victory over the enemy was through claiming God’s power in my life.
A few moments passed, the quiet and firm voice spoke again, “Karen, right now, I need you to say out loud three things you are thankful for.” I responded with much frustration, “I will never thank God for MS!” (My husband has a very progressive form of MS that had been wreaking much havoc in our lives.) And then the voice was sweet and compassionate but still quiet and firm, “That’s okay, Karen. I understand and am not asking you to give thanks for MS. I’m asking you to say three things out loud you are thankful for.”
Finally, after realizing there was nothing else to do at this moment but to do as she requested, I muster enough breath to utter three things that I was thankful for even though at that moment I wasn’t feeling grateful. As I began to speak my gratitude, my panic feeling very slowly began to subside a tiny bit. As I finished the list of three things I was thankful for, which might have taken me quite awhile to get three thankfuls, my breathing began to slow.
Expressing Gratitude Reduces Panic
This happened to be my first experience with a panic attack, and has not been my last. However, I am forever grateful for the wisdom God chose to pour into me in those moments by using a wise friend to speak His words.
- Expressing gratitude begins to take the focus off of myself and places my focus on God.
- Expressing gratitude elevates God’s power over and above the enemy’s.
- Expressing gratitude can be learned. Start practicing gratitude every day.
The enemy loves nothing better to paralyze us with anxiety and fear. I often must ask myself, “Do I want to give the enemy a place in my life? Or do I want to put the enemy in his place under God’s control?”
The next time anxiety and panic overwhelms your heart and body, somehow someway find a way to speak God’s power over the enemy by elevating God to His proper place.
(Find out more about developing an Attitude of Gratitude.)
Karen Smith spends most of her time caring for her family. In her spare time, she blogs of their life struggles at glimpsesoffaithandstruggles.com. Her desire is to allow others to see real life in the face of struggles but always points you back to Christ in the middle of those struggles.
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