Is Work/Life Balance a Purple Unicorn – a Mythical Beast?
They say you can tell what is important in someone’s life by looking at their calendar and their check book. If that’s true, why was I always saying, “I can’t go – I have to work?” I said family was the most important thing in my life, but I often worked late several nights a week. Once I missed a weekend getaway with extended family, just so I could work on a Saturday. What was I thinking? I needed to get a life. More specifically, I needed to find that ever elusive work/life balance.
That’s the problem. You’ll never find it. It doesn’t exist unless you create it. And of course, it will take some of that already overscheduled time to do it. Once you carve out the time, do these four things:
- Set Priorities. Decide exactly what’s important to you. Is it your family, career, finances, travel, or something else entirely? List 3-5 things you value, then prioritize them from most to least important.
- Build Your Schedule. Review your calendar. Schedule in time for what you said were your priorities. Did anything you do currently not make the priority list? That means you need to let it go. Sometimes it’s about compromise – choosing between two priority activities that happen at the same time. Which is higher on your priority list? That’s your winner.
- Set Boundaries. Others won’t respect your time if you don’t. Once you’ve scheduled something, don’t let anything get in the way. What if you’ve scheduled a date night and find yourself with a desk full of work? Assuming your date is a higher priority on your list than your job, you have a decision to make. Obviously if you’re going to lose your job if things don’t get finished, reschedule your date night. Just don’t make a habit of it. But, if your job is secure, learn to walk away. You can learn more about setting boundaries in all areas of your life here.
- Speak Up. When someone asks you to do something that doesn’t align with your priorities, learn to say no. Enforce those boundaries. Conversely, when you want to do something that conflicts with something that is a lower priority, learn to rearrange your activities or reschedule the lower priority activity.
This is a simple process, but it’s not easy. It takes time and practice to develop new habits. I use a self-improvement cycle I call the PIRA Process. See if it works for you.
Lessons Learned
We’re all busy. No one wants to miss anything important, and you don’t have to if you follow these four steps to achieving a good work/life balance:
- Decide what’s important in your life
- Schedule time for your priorities
- Set up and enforce boundaries for respecting your time
- Speak up when you want to do something, stop doing something, or when someone disrespects your boundaries
Is it time for you to get a life? I can honestly say, I finally have one. The existence of the purple unicorn still remains a mystery, but I have found the elusive work/life balance I always wanted. You can too.
Need help implementing these self-care strategies in your own life? Check out my Joy Journal. It’s a combination planner/journal to help support attempts to manage your emotions and make positive habit changes.
Need inspiration and encouragement? Join me on Facebook on the Sadness to Joy page. That’s where you’ll find the daily encouragement and accountability you need to help bring your plan into existence.
What are the most important things in your life? How are you going to reorder your life to make room for them?
